There Is No Red Pill
by Faceted
Summary: Neo would do anything for Trinity. Even if it meant never knowing the truth behind the Matrix. AU.


Neo was awake long before the click-click of the door being opened but he kept his eyes shut because he could almost see flashes and splashes of green code scrolling downwards. Fluorescent lights flickered on. He knew this because it was no longer dark enough behind his eyelids to see the code. He'd been so close to understanding it! Denied the truth at the verry edge of epiphany!

"Good morning, Mr. Anderson. You've slept in late today."

Neo cringed. He knew that voice and hated it, feared it. He hated that he feared it. Agent Smith had come to send another strange, insectoid needle crawling through his brains and ask him more questions about Zion.

"Get out of here, Smith." Neo snarled, standing up on the mattress and putting his back against the wall. "I'll never tell you where Zion is!" The springs creaked beneath him and he was sure he could use them to jump right through the ceiling. If he tried hard enough, he could break out of this white on white on white room with it's buzzing flourescent lights and shiny floor.

"Now, Thomas..." Morpheus came in behind Smith like an oily shadow. Neo's stomach twisted as though he'd just eaten something disgusting, and he pointed a dramatic finger at the black man. "Traitor! The Oracle warned me about you!"

"....is that any way to speak to Dr. Smith?" he continued as though he hadn't heard Neo's accusation, "He's only trying to help you." Morpheus just handed him a tiny paper cup. Neo stared into it and counted the tablets. Four. There were four. Orange, white, green, blue.

"Are you going to take your medication quietly today, Mr. Anderson?" Dr. Smith adjusted his glasses.

"I don't want to take the blue pill." Neo murmured. The blue one meant you stayed in the Matrix. Blue meant you never learned the truth. "I'll never take it. I want the red one." Red like the exit sign that led down the rabbit hole to Zion.

"There is no red pill, Thomas. You took the blue pill yesterday and the day before that. Don't you remember?" Neo didn't remember because he'd never taken the blue pill. He always chose the red one. Unless he had taken the blue pill and forgotten that he'd taken it. Where was Trinity? She would remember. "Where's Trinity?" he asked Morpheus.

Dr. Smith answered, not bothering to look up from his handheld, the stylus clicking against the screen like the tack-tap-tack-tap of insect robot toes. "Jessica is with another patient right now."

"Let her go and I'll do anything you want. Just let her go!"

"Alright, Thomas." Morpheus said, "Alright. Just take your medicine."

"Not until I see Trinity."

"Very well." Smith sighed, tapped a few notes on his handheld and left.

"Jessica will be by in a few minutes, Thomas"

Neo heard them talking just outside the door. He didn't even have to press his ear to the jam to hear them clearly. "... delusions are becoming more complex. He still insists that he's some sort of messiah destined to free the world from a computer program."

"Has he been disturbing the other patients?"

"Not as much. I think they've more or less gotten used to him. He's actually managed to make a few friends..."

"Ah, there you are Jessica. Mr. Anderson refuses to take his medication unless you're the one administering it to him."

"Oh, the red pill thing again? A few drops of food colouring worked well last time."

The door opened and Neo jumped back up onto the bed to defend himself, but was only Trinity. She was wearing shapeless clothing with white rabbits printed in a repeating pattern. The pattern was disrupted by the pocket. A tiny flaw in the Matrix that he might exploit if only he could remember the code he'd almost figured out before the lights had come on. "How are you this morning, Thomas?" She was beautiful no matter what she wore.

"Please don't call me that, Trinity"

"How are you?" She set the breakfast tray down. It was eggs and grits and toast but it wasn't.

"I'm glad you're okay." Neo picked up the spoon and stared at his reflection. It was all wrong. The reflection was upside down. "It's not real. There is no spoon." He tried to make it change, make it right. His head started to hurt but the spoon wouldn't bend. Trinity smiled, "Okay Thomas. Take your pills. You can chase them down with orange juice."

"And then you get to go free."

"Yes, then I get to go home for the day."

"To Zion."

"Something like that." She shook the little paper cup between her fingers and the pills rattled, rasped like dry bones. Neo would do anything for Trinity. Even if it meant never knowing the truth behind the Matrix. Neo dumped the pills into his mouth. He could feel the blue pill sliding down his throat; slowly obliterating his knowledge. Maybe that was a good thing. If he didn't know the truth, he couldn't tell Agent Smith and Zion would be safe. Trinity would be safe. "Now lift your tongue. Thank you, Thomas."

"Take care, Trinity."

"I'll see you tomorrow."

"Okay."

A phone rang in the distance and the door clicked into place with a finality that nearly shattered his heart. Agent Smith was out there! Trinity didn't know about Morpheus' treachery! "No!"

Neo stumbled off the bed and crashed to the floor because the sheets had tangled around his ankles. They were re-writing the program! The sheets were trying to strangle him! "Run Trinity! Run! Save yourself! Run!" He crawled to the door, kicking the sheets until they tore away. He pounded on the door until blood smeared on the cold stainless steel.

Sitting with his back pressed against the door, he could only hope that she had made it to the phone before they disconnected the line.


End file.
